News Report - weird Happenings!

Tayrn here. Here's a section from a recent Alistaire Traficant column. For those who don't know Traficant is a friend of Mr. Oliphaunt and a drinking buddy of the Duck. He's claims to be part Svart Aelfan, whatever that means. He's alternatively charming and selfish, and I've had to lay him out on more than one occasion.

And finally, there is no need to tell me any further about the mysterious events occurring at the Adam's Mark Hotel. Some unmitigated nonsense about an electricity monster? I'm not denying the dark visitors that sometimes plague our world. I've visited cyclopean tombs and eldricht temples on five continents, and I can attest that such creatures clearly exist. But not in Jacksonville Florida.

I'm informed that there was even a science fiction convention being held at that hotel; what people took as a electricity monster was probably some sort of elaborate costume. As for tales of a man leaping and running along side the third story windows, well, let me just say that in the real world there's a distinct shortage of wires for people to hang from.

As always I encourage my readers to watch for the real wonders and dangers of the unseen world, while keeping an eye out for transparent frauds such as this.

The official records of that night have been scrubbed as normal, and the video cameras from the hotel lobby were, fortunately, completely destroyed during the fight. Quite a feat that, but we were pretty alert that night.