Monday, June 14, 2004

A Few Procedual Notes

Mr. Oliphaunt has suggested that I (Tayrn, for those who don't know) give a brief insight into how our organization works. After a weekend spent stealing illicit technology from the Seven Skateboarding Samurai, you'd think he would give me a break. But apparently not.

At any rate, I'll make this brief. Although Mr. Oliphaunt remains sequestered in Central Florida (from which he runs the American contingent), he has set up satellite organizations in Europe and Asia, and we hope to have organizations in Central and South America and Africa soon.

The organization in Europe has the name "The Mangy Unicorn Society" and is housed in Kaiserslatern, Germany. It is made up exclusively of women, as Mr. Oliphaunt does not believe that Men and Woman should serve in the same organization. After continued exposure he has realized that Women are as skilled in kicking ass and taking names as Men. He retains, however, the retrograde fantasy that Woman will distract Men (and I have to say that there is some evidence to support this view point. Men are pretty stupid when it comes to this sort of interaction).

At any rate the European organization has about 8 members, all very skilled. Among their ranks are Molly O'Shaunessay, bare knuckle champion of Shannon, 5 years running (although it seems unlikely she will make it back this year), Madrigella who has been working for the Italian Secret Service since she was 15 and running it since she was 23 (she needed more of a challenge and runs the Mangy Unicorn society), and a woman known as Gretal, who has an uncanny to ability to find anything and several other horrifying aspects.

The Asian organization is called "The Silent Mongoose Society" and is housed in Thiruvananthapuram, India. It is the other male society, and the smallest of the groups, with 5 members. The members include two martial artists, Master Hoshi and Quon Jih-Eux. Master Hoshi is a master of the Blade along with Crane Style Kung Fu. Quon Jih-Eaux is a master of Bear Style Kung Fu and is extremely strong. They also have Old Man Crow, a Native American shaman who served in the Korean War, and came to enjoy the area, and Vivek, a masked vigilante (the name means Justice) who had to be shown that his enemies were not just the cartels and tongs that menaced India.

The American organization, the actual Rogue Elephant society, is still in the final process of being put together; but it looks like it will be the largest with about 15 members. Among them are an ex-Mafia hitman named Johnny Grease, a cybernetic ape (that Mr. Oliphaunt has been under some pains to keep hidden) from the future, the Ghost of a Hong Kong cop named Billy Ho, and a transformed Mallard and Polynesian P.I. named "the Duck." We'll have to hope they can pull of the missions that Mr. Oliphaunt is going to ask of them.

Anyway this website will strive to record all of our groups missions and assignments; but obviously since I have more information on the American group (due to proximity) I will be covering them in some what greater detail.

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